Friday, July 19, 2013

Breakfast with a Tiffany

Someone dripping with diamonds would like to speak on the subject.
 
Yes? You in the corner. Go ahead:
 
Shine. Shiny objects. We're fascinated by them. Whether it's cars, furniture, clothing, jewelry, hair,  even makeup cases (I'm talking to you Marc Jacobs). We're hard-wired to be attracted to people and objects who and that reflect light. Was it originally for survival? Or an another fine example of our narcissism? We like to be able to see ourselves reflected back?
 
When it comes to jewelry, and  you think of bling, what do you picture? The Hope diamond? Encrusted grill? Maybe a simple cocktail ring that would look gaudy, or even cheesy, if it wasn't called a 'cocktail' ring.
 
And, hey, who coined the word 'bling' anyway? (Note to self: check Urban Dictionary.)
 
Well, anyway, today we're going to talk about Rhinestones........... Or, more accurately, stones from the Rhine. That's where they were originally from. Duh. It's true. Discovered in the mid-18th or 19th century, I forget which, they soon adorned the fashionable, if not the rich.
 
Then, of course, as we humans are wont to do, we mined the Rhine for these shiny, glistening stones until they'd gone the way of an extinct species. But the name stayed because, let's face it, it's a great word. And when Providence, Rhode Island, became the capital not just of Little Rhody but of costume jewelry, the word Rhinestones definitely had the charm that Little Rhody gems, or Pawtucket baubles, or Providence bijoux lacked.
 
The moral of this story is similar to Jerry Seinfeld's philosophy of comedy and Chris Rock's philosophy of wealth: it's better to have bling with sentimental value than Harry Winston rocks that are commodities.
 
Of course, if it's real ice with sentimental value, and I say this with utmost sincerity, so much the better................